Truths For Mature Humans
1 - I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear you computer history if you die.2 - Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize your're wrong.
3 - I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4 - There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
5 - How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6 - Was learning cursive really necessary?
7 - Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm ptretty sure I know how to get out of my neghborhood.8 - Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person dies.
9 - I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10 - Bad decisions make good stories.
11 - You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12 - Can we all just agree to ignore whatever technology is invented after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again. (nor learn how to use it)
13 - I'm aloways slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I did not make any changes to.
14 - I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
15 - I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16 - I dissagree with Kay Jewelers. I bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Budweiser then Kay.
17 - I wish Google Maps has an "Avoid this Neighborhood" routing option.
18 - I have a hard time decipering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19 - How many times is it appropriate to say "what?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
20 - I love the sense of camaraderie when an antire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.
21 - Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
22 - sometimes I'll look down at my watch 2 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
23 - Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating there car keys in a pocket, findeing their cell phone, and {inning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze butting from 3 feel away, in about 1.7 secons, eyes closed, first time, everytime.
24 - The first testicular guard, the "cup", was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
Now I want you to tell me what you would add to this list! I know I have friends that could add to this! Here I've got one :
Nothing beats that first time you listen to what you've said and realize that you do, in fact, sound like your mother.
I'm sure we can come up with more! come on Mature Humans! Lets see what you've got!
Love Mush!
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